Editorial by Ninja Andy

How the hell do these things happen? Commercialism has had a vast effect on America for a long time. It's been very easy to trick Americans into buying crap, especially children. One country that loves selling crap to Americans is Japan. In their eyes, America is just one big bunch of suckers. But the latest crap craze that Japan has unleashed on our country is completely ridiculous, Pokémon!

I know what you're saying, "But my kids love it!" Bull****! Your kids don't love it! They have been tricked by one of their oldest and most trusted Japanese friends, Nintendo.

Now you all think I'm cRaZy! How could Nintendo be responsible when they have all these other things? Well, let me explain. Pokémon was hugely popular in Japan. They love their lame animation. A few years ago, Nintendo tried to introduce Pokémon into America. The problem was, nobody cared! Our original view of it was, "This s*** sucks!" Nintendo was then in a dilemma. They wanted Pokémon to be a cash cow in America like it was in Japan. That's when they released the second swarm of Pokécrap. After it didn't sell, Nintendo did the one thing that always makes things sell. They told America, the country that hated Pokémon that America loved Pokémon! A blatant lie! People believed them. The 8-12 year olds thought that all their friends would want it, so they got it. When marketing people saw this, they made tie ins with major brands. Then there was all the crap: TV, movies, memorbilia, all for something that people only think they like because Nintendo told them to!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Once it was on TV, the little kids saw it, and any chance of avoiding it was gone!!! Nintendo had completely brainwashed our youth, just to make some money for their Pearl Harbor bombing buddies!!!!!!!!!!

Well, I'm not Nintendo, but I'm going to try the same thing to see if it works! Hey America! America looooovvvveeeesss Neo-Nazis and Communism!!!!! Go Clippers!

Go Home To Plan A Plot To Destroy The Pokémons

© 1999 Dimbee