Take Tamagotchi, mix in the evil Pokémon, throw in gross and random commercialism, and presto! You have Neopets! At Neopets, underneath the guise of an innocent children's (but far from educational) website full of ugly, deformed asian anime creatures, lies the true beast. Commercialism is mixed into the content. Therefore, children are actually playing the commercial! This kind of product placement, while admittedly effective, is inherently evil. This kind of deep mental suggestion will warp a child's mind... but it's ok because they are making a lot of money... EVIL BASTARDS! The content isn't even quality or original. Most of the flash games are ripoffs of classic games with some Neocrap splattered across it. To make it worse, when a new commercial promotion comes out, they modify a game from a previous commercial promotion to make it reflect the new product, generally the next new piece of trash Disney releases. You heard me, Disney! EVIL BASTARDS! |
The content itself is far from G-rated. There are tons of sexual innuendoes. For example, there is the "weiner taco". There are alcoholic beverages that you can feed to your pets, teaching your children to not only be alcoholics, but to feed beer to the dog. Then there's Battledome. Imagine Mad Max or Final Fantasy 3. The difference here is, it's not player vs player. It's player's pet vs player's pet or even player's pet's pet vs player's pet's pet. There are some serious ethical issues with having your pet fight to the death with someone else's pet. Neopets endorses cockfighting! |
As if the inherent commercial nature of the site wasn't enough, there's the obvious merchandising. Your pets have "plushies" on there... you KNEW they were going to make toys! Then, they got the happy meal thing going. Actually, I really don't have a problem with those two types of merchandising at face value. It's the bribery to buy the merchandise I have a problem with. If a child was not inclined to buy a retarded looking anime reject plushie, they may be convinced once they find out they get game items or Neopoints for buying it. Or, you could just pay money directly to Neopets for Neopoints by getting a paid membership... yep, you heard me, trading real money for imaginary money. THIS IS TOO FAR! EVIL BASTARDS! Oh no! A Playstation 2 game! They are becoming Pokémon faster than I thought!!! |
Up to this point, I've pretended that the members of this site are children, which, really, they should be. However, the truth is, most of the people on this CHILDREN'S site are middle aged women with no lives. Now, before they get mad at the little Ninja Panda, I want to ask them how many hours they spend on Neopets per week. If it is greater than 14, they have no life, plain and simple. Quit fooling yourselves! Anyway, these people with no lives spend most of their time in the guilds. A guild is a group where everybody tries to make a ton of money. However, guilds get no extra pay from Neopets, and there are no real ways to use teamwork to make money... at least no ways that won't get you frozen by the Nazipets staff. Therefore, the only money in the guild is the money the members put into it. So, the pursuit for riches never works very well, and somebody always gets screwed. People pretend to be real friends, communicating in IM clients off of Neopets, but if somebody doesn't feel they are getting enough out of the person on Neopets, suddenly, they hate the other person, ban them from their guild, and quit communicating with them offsite. |
People take this CHILDREN'S site way too seriously. They spend half their empty lives on it. Then, at any time, without warning, and sometimes, without any reason other than they think you are becoming too successful, the Nazipets staff will freeze your account, and you lose everything. Now, seriously folks, I'm often a bit of a sarcastic smartass, but this time I'm serious. The people at that awful site have got to be stopped. |
Neopets endorses:Neopets destroys: So, come on Neopets, just die, and take that really blatant knockoff Marapets with you. Now that I think of it, some people may take offense to me relating Neopets to Hitler and Nazis. I really shouldn't have classed them together, so I'm going to offer an apology right now. I'm sorry to Hitler and the Nazis for associating them with this EVIL CRAP! |
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