69_tonystewart20_69 writes: "hey man why dont you shut up abuot home depot your stupid and lame and dont make ne sense most of the time when ur wrtgiin thsi crap you clal an websit you suck and u no it and ur stupid 20 rules yur ass bitch"

Ninja Andy Replies: Ok... I'm not sure if I am supposed to laugh my ass off, or scream: "HELP, MY TURD FROM THE OVEN AT HOME DEPOT HAS COME TO LIFE AND LEARNED TO USE EMAIL, ALTHOUGH IT STILL HASN'T MASTERED LITERACY!" By the way, 20 ruling my ass... not mine, maybe yours, but not mine.

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brent_harwald94 writes: "Dude, you are one hell of an ego trip. You do realize that the world doesn't revolve around you, right? By the way, what exactly are the job description of the Prime Minster of Andyville? Seriously man, if you keep your head in your butt its going to start to stink."

Ninja Andy Replies: YOU'RE A ROUNDTABLE! What do you know about Andyville politics? Seriously man, you couldn't even get into my cabinet. It has a padlock. It's not a cheap one either. It's a Master Lock. Just ask James Marsters... or whatever that roidy wrestler guy with the full nelson is called.... NOBODY breaks a Master Lock!

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smblksam47401 writes:
"Dear Ninja Andy,
I just found your site and it is really funny. I have some questions. Where did you learn to be a Ninja? Was it when you were a trick bear from the circus or something? Did someone in your family teach you? Are there any other members of your family that are Ninjas? Do any of them have crazy websites as well? Finally, who the hell is Wade Keller? There was something about Wade Keller in on the the things on your site and I didn't get it. Keep pooping in ovens! SAM"

Ninja Andy Replies: Thanks for writing, Sam. Good to see someone respects the Ninja. Lets see, to answer your questions: 1) on the streets 2) I was never in the circus, I was in the zoo 3) no 4) sorta 5) I sure hope not. However, my grandfather was the famous Crown Prince Samurai Grandy Napolean Panda. He had a short lived program on the DuMont network. 6) I have no clue who Wade Keller is. Wait, I think it was the duck on U.S. Acres... you know, the one that was scared of everything... man U.S. Acres sucked... why couldn't there just be more Garfield and less of that crap. Stupid U.S. Acres with its stupid Wade Keller, Orson Wells, Sheldon Benjamin, Rooster Cogburn, and that little chicken Booker T.... thanks for writing!

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Some guy named Craig or something... maybe Ray, or Tre, or Clay, I dunno.. writes: "Jerkwad, huh? 1337, as in 'leet' or 'elite' written by some illiterate, broken english typing, chat room douche? 'Pretentious' you say? I'd rather be pretentious than write an article that features 'suck' 178 times! That's some really inspired material you've written there, Mr. Panda. Why didn't you spotlight the old photo album feature? That was some, as I believe you say: 'suckity suck suckness.' Wow... just wow. You're requesting respect for this fine journalism? 'The suck stops here.' Indeed!"

Ninja Andy Replies: I don't know who you are, or what you're talking about, but I don't think you could do any better at writing here than I can. The photo album did not suck! We went over this in the History of Andyville! 4 ur in4m8shun, if I remember correctly, every party involved agreed that it was totally 1337, and 0wn3d for all eternity. Thus, it roXors, and you SUCK! You should just stick to writing stupid things about stupid wrestling that stupid nobody stupid cares about, or about Jesse White and Kanye Mutumbo or eating TV's.... assuming you write about things like that. You're probably too dumb to write though, let alone compose mail and send it to me. Go away!

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y3r_m0m writes: "I did y3r m0m last night and now I itch. Can u tell me where the VD clinic is? Lates!"

Ninja Andy Replies: How do I even answer a question like that? First, your name is "y3r_m0m," and you were saying you did "y3r m0m." Now, this would imply you did yourself. I don't care what you do with your 40 oz bottle of Vaselube, so we'll pretend your name is lame_internet_dork. So, lame_internet_dork, you did my mom? Are you a panda? If not, why are you admitting to having sexual relations with an obese female Panda? You're a sick little internet dork. Anyway, to answer your question, I'm not sure where the VD clinic is, never been there. Maybe you should ask YOUR mom. I've heard that when she comes in there, they yell her name, just like when Norm enters Cheers.

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That should be enough to amuse myself with. Email us so we can feature your e-letters just like the ones above! Everybody's addresses are on their pages. But seriously, I'm the only one worth mailing anyway. I totally carry this site. No mail from the other Andyvilles yet. They're scared of me.

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